The Philippine Onion

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Archive for November 1st, 2007

BBC’s Tim Sebastian rejects ANC offer, paving way for Dean Bocobo

Posted by commiedyan on November 1, 2007

by The Small and Medium at Large

In the past weeks, ANC news director Maria Ressa has been in secret talks with the Beeb’s Tim Sebastian, unceremoniously kicked out from Hard Talk and replaced by Stephen Sackur for undisclosed reasons.

Ressa has been looking for a host who would take no bull from guests. While most anchors (Ricky Carandang, Pia Hontiveros, Manolo Quezon, to name a few) of ANC have been improving in skill, they still do not make the cut for Maria Ressa. They are too young and polite, and at times plainly gullible.

Sebastian had a long line of demands, ranging from a chartered jet to the country every week to luxurious accommodations.

All these benefitted Dean Bocobo, but he also has demands ANC finds too expensive to fulfill.

For one, Dean wants the saxophonist John Klemmer, who has declined the offer because of the requirement that he act as comedian too.

Two, Dean wants a band ala David Letterman’s.

On the part of the Lopezes, they are understandably disturbed by persistent rumors that Bocobo might have secret links to the Rizalist cults from the Visayas and Mindanao.

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