The Philippine Onion

Lies and half-truths shall set you free

Weather bulletin: Mina to skirt Metro Manila

Posted by commiedyan on November 23, 2007

“I’ll be away from Manila for some time to attend to family and business affairs in the United States,” sexy star Ara Mina told TPO in an interview at her pasta joint on Maginhawa st., UP Village at dawn today.

She would neither confirm nor deny her alleged stormy affair with Manny Pacquiao, who has claimed the rumors were spread to spark interest in their latest movie.

Meanwhile, the latest bulletin from the weather bureau quoted by the perpetually giggling Gretchen Fullido said the Bicol region is already being inundated by typhoon Mina, to be welcomed this afternoon by Albay governor Joey Salceda. Anthony Golez of the national disaster coordinating council was also quoted as saying they had completed the evacuation of two million Bicolanos to Metro Manila.

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