The Philippine Onion

Lies and half-truths shall set you free

Onionism

This peer-reviewed journal of Philippine cornography is brought to you by loonies, paranoiacs, and insomniacs who feel compelled to make fun of Philippine society, real and surreal, the avant garde in science and philosophy, creationism, intelligent design, ex-postmodernism, and the compulsively correct.
Our mission is to peddle lies, half-truths, and intrigue in the hope you will be goaded into finding the truth for yourself. Thus, our guiding philosophy: half-truths shall set you free!

WE value our independence and integrity and do not bow to any vested interests. We are supported exclusively by generous and anonymous contributors who refuse to be identified with us. Nor do they want their products and services advertised on our pages. But in the spirit of transparency we say this much of them: outstanding members of the community who sell: (1) habit-forming substances conventionally thought of as harmful; (2) duty-free goods—which may or may not contain toxic substances—so you the consumer will get the best price possible; (3) anything whose claims cannot be verified, including ‘organically grown’ vegetables and fruits; (4) wonderful dreams through lottery. With this, we offer you this added insight: Ignorance is the stepmother of freedom.

While we strive to meet the highest standards of our trade, we cannot however guarantee that everything we say is free from any grain of that which cannot be demonstrably untrue. We therefore absolve ourselves of any liability for any damage which might befall those who are beguiled.

Our reports are factual and we stand by them. We will never ever base them on anonymous sources. We name all our sources, even if they are fictitious.

Our opinions are never bigotted because we believe you should share our biases.

One Response to “Onionism”

  1. 🙂

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